There is a lot to learn about the importance of communication in relationships. Communication is what drives cultures and makes it possible for us to live together in the world. Without the ability to communicate, we may as well be dead. Successful relationships are first a function of effective communication. There are several aspects of communication and those aspects all have a role to play when it comes to the quality of relationships we have. It is a common fact that communication is a vital part of relationships and it may sometimes seem like there are so many complexities related with building a relationship. But since there are different forms of communication and more so, different tips we can use to use in different situations, it is important that you know those which apply specifically to enhancing effective relationships and how you can apply them to get the best results. Your relationship will take another turn for the better when you learn and practice the following relationship communication tips.

Knowing and choosing the right time

When it comes to communication in relationships, timing is everything. If you cant figure out the right time to talk or communicate with your partner, you better wait until you know when to. There are different things we want to tell our partners at different points in time and while it is important that they hear what we want to say or receive the message we are passing across, for the purpose of getting the intended results, it is important that we pick the right time to communicate. Building strong relationships goes beyond simply trying to communicate to choosing the right time to do so.

Lets say a lady wants to express her need for something to her partner. Her desire is that he gives her what she wants but that may not happen if she tells him at the wrong time. If that demand is made when the man is going through some financial tough times, she can expect him to ignore her demand or even get upset by the fact that she asked in the first place. If that happens and the lady in question is not understanding, a serious problem may ensue and that could strain or even break up the relationship.

Whatever a person intends to pass across as information in a relationship, he or she has to consider the timing. There are times when people are alert and happy. At other times they are grumpy, sad or tired. The time when you choose to communicated may either help make or mar the efforts you are putting into building a relationship. You should keep in mind that choosing the right time to communicate is one of the most important relationship communication tips.

If you have something against your partner, it is wise to carefully consider when you choose to talk about it. The better your timing, the more likely it will be for the matter to be solved. Whenever you communicate with your partner, especially on something unusual or when there is a misunderstanding, make sure that you pick the right timing. If you will time it right, you increase your chances of being understood.

Understand that your partner is not a mind reader

Sometimes, you wish your partner will understand how you feel about certain issues or what you want at a particular time. Building strong relationships entails that both partners learn to express themselves freely. They may be able to tell what the other person is trying to communicate sometimes but there are obviously going to be moments when your partner will not have a clue what you wish you could tell them or what is in your mind and heart. Your partner is not a mind reader so he or she is depending, most of the time on what you are able to communicate to them through your words and actions. If you become so uptight that you cannot express yourself, you will hardly be able to keep communication with your partner. Men especially hardly want to talk about what they may be going through even when it is necessary and imperative that they do. Sometimes, guys are deceived into thinking explaining their issues to their partners is a sign of weakness. However, there are few things that could help you bond more intimately or communicate better with your partner than when she knows you trust her enough to share your every thought with her. It is a vital part of keeping successful relationships.

It is even common for partners to keep quiet when they have a lot to say, wishing that their partners will show enough interest to ask and find out what is happening. Women too do this quite often and the phrase to cover up the attitude is…. I am fine or Its ok. These are statements you could make to people who are not close in terms of their relationship with you. It will be unfair and inappropriate to always cover up your problems with statements like “its ok” or “i will be fine” when your partner is concerned about your happiness and well being. We all have moments when we just want to be alone, left to our own thoughts. But for those who will have effective and fulfilling relationships, you cannot let this kind of attitude become your default. Let it not be something you do often. It is only going to strain the relationship and slowly but surely tear you two apart from each other. Talk to your partner whenever you have something to say. Be open. This is very necessary for building strong relationships.

The importance and power of listening

Listening is a very important aspect of communication. Those who have gone through any formal communication training will have at least an idea about just how vital listening is to communication. Listening is even more important when it comes to communication in relationships. A lot of emphasis is always placed on what one is saying when communicating but it is just as important that you listen well as it is that you express yourself well. As a matter of fact, it will be better to pay more attention to the way you listen than to the way you talk. If you properly understand what is being said to you, there is a greater chance that you are going to respond rightly. For the effectiveness of relationships, listening does not end at hearing. Listening is a vital part of successful relationships. Building strong relationship could be very difficult if you don’t learn and cultivate the habit of listening. It is the anchor of relationship communication tips.

Listening to your partner usually means more to him or her than just a desire to hear what he or she is saying so that you can give an appropriate response. For people in relationships, listening is a sign of commitment and love. Ladies especially take the issue of listening seriously. You could easily make your girlfriend or wife seriously angry if she notices that you are not listening to what she says. It does not matter what is distracting you, a woman does not like the idea that there is any other thing you will consider so important enough to share your attention with. When your partner talks to you, he or she will love to know that you are listening. This will make the process of communication easier and improve the quality of your relationship.

When it comes to developing a relationship, we cannot just talk about listening as an abstract idea. There are certain things you must do to show your partner that you are listening to him or her. If these things are not in place, no matter how many times you say “i am listening” it will make no sense to your partner because they cannot be convinced.

Maintain eye contact. I know there are some casual discussions you could have with your partner while seriously engaged with something else. You could talk while you watch a TV program or do the dishes for example. When it comes to something your partner considers serious enough to require your full attention, it is important to give him or her the assurance that he has your undivided attention. If you are watching the TV for example, turn it off and maintain eye contact as your partner talks to you. If you can keep the TV on and still maintain eye contact, that’s ok. Also make sure your partner is comfortable having something that may distract you around as he or she talks with you.

Next, show signs that you are actually following up on what he or she is saying. You can do this by asking appropriate questions when necessary. Be careful not to ask a question that will show that you have not been listening. Nod every now and then in approval or disapproval of something they say. All these are signs that you are actually listening to what your partner is saying and they are expressions of love to your partner.

Be wise in your conversation

When you discuss with your partner, make sure you talk wisely. There are statements that could turn a conversation off and there are other statements that help build conversations. If you have discovered that your partner does not like it when you mention certain things in your conversations, try to avoid saying such things. It may be mentioning something they don’t like because of past experiences. Just respect their choices and avoid saying such things.

Watch how you use words like I, My and Me

In a relationship, there are two people involved. Though each of them is a distinct individual, they see themselves as two people with such unity, intimacy and oneness that it could hurt either partner to hear the other make statements that exclude them. This may seem like a simple matter but it is very necessary for building strong relationships When ever you talk with your partner, especially in matters that should concern you both, make sure to use the words WE and US, rather than I and ME. Doing this could improve on the strength and intimacy of your relationship. Successful relationships are built on unity, not individuality.

When you make statements with words that include your partner instead of those that exclude them and isolate you, they may feel that you are being self centered. This would cause the average person to wonder if he or she has any future with you.

Normally, words like ME and I, are actually a sign of self-centeredness and selfishness. So your partner may not be far from the truth if they suspect that you are being selfish or do not really want them to be part of the things that are important to you. He or she may be right and even if he is not, you have to make some adjustments to the way you communicate before you ruin your relationship slowly but surely.

Try not to interrupt

One very common thing that people do to frustrate communication in relationships is interrupting while the other person talks. When you interrupt the other person simply wonders if what he or she is saying makes any sense to you. They know that your interruptions may be a hindrance that keeps you from listening to or even understanding what you are saying. So at the end of the day both of you may have done a lot of talking but neither of you has understood what the other said. Things would be far better in your relationship if you make up your mind to respect your partner and exercise enough patience and self discipline to listen to him or her talk. Refusing to talk while your partner talks is a demonstration of respect for your partner and it is at the same time powerful enough to attract respect from your partner.

No matter how serious the matter at hand is or how convinced you are that your perspectives are right, you must understand that most times, it is better to be at peace and happy than to be right. And also there are better ways to get your partner to understand what you are saying and take sides with you.

Learning and taking advantage of body language

Body language is another very powerful aspect of communication in relationships. One which you can use positively to make communication between yourself and your partner far better than it is. There is so much that our body language says about us. For example, you can easily tell when your partner is ready for a discussion and when he or she is not based on their body language.

You may not have to take a body language course or anything like that. However, there are some very simple body language signals we use very often which are actually very helpful to understanding your partner and making the communication process better. For example, folded arms usually mean “i don’t really want to talk right now” or having your partner’s feet point towards you while you talk to each other could mean I am interested in what you are saying. The issue of body language goes right up to sexuality of couples. Couples most often use body language to signal their desire to have some sexual intimacy.

While signals like these could be beneficial to know and be able to use, you should make sure you never take it too far. They are things you could notice every now and then which could help you understand your partner better. You don’t want to be a detective, analyzing and judging every action and body language signal of your partner. If you desire to practice this particular one, you must make up your mind to be very flexible so that what is meant to help you does not instead help pull you further apart from your partner.

Most times, actions really speak louder than words

There are many things that are better communicated through actions. Couples sometimes underestimate the value of actions when it comes to communication in relationships. It is important to know when your partner needs you to act rather than talk. There are times when making a change in your action is what communicates best to your partner. In such moments it is futile to communicate by talking when your partner wants you to act.

If your partner has been talking to you about stopping some detrimental habit like smoking, you must understand that nothing you say will make any sense to him or her if you are not taking any actions that assure her that you are committed to changing for the better. In a situation like this, whenever you both discuss the issue, make sure you talk about the actions you have been taking to change, not just your intention to change.

Ask questions

When you communicate with your partner, be sure to ask follow-up questions. There are two very important reasons why you should ask questions as you communicating with your partner. First, asking appropriate questions when you talk with your partner tells him or her that you are really interesting in what he or she is saying. It gives your partner the confidence that you are involved in the discussion, not just passively but actively. Successful relationships are a function of knowing and applying some simple but powerful communication tips. Learning to ask the right questions when necessary is one of the most important relationship communication tips and it is vital to building a relationship.

Secondly, asking questions when communicating with your partner is a great way to tell your partner that you understand what he or she is saying. As couples, sometimes when you talk about some matters with your partner, it is not so that he or she can give you a solution or quick fix to the issue. Its just so you know someone shares the burden or hurt or confusion with you. Women especially are usually very critical about explaining their problems to their partners. A lady could talk about every experience she had during the day and expect you to listen to them all, no matter how long and boring they may seem to you. It is important that you have the the patience to listen to your partner. It may seem useless and unreasonable at the moment but that simple act could revolutionize the way you communicate in other areas of your relationship.

Learn to share your experiences

For ladies, this may not be a problem. Women naturally have the tendency to talk about their experiences freely with their partners. It seems to be a gift they posses. All the man has to do is be willing to listen to his wife narrate her experiences and show her that he understands all what she is saying. The husband who understands how important this is for building strong relationships will take the matter serious. On the part of the man, however, it usually seems to be the exact opposite. For some reason, men don’t like the idea of sharing their experiences with their partners. A man could talk with his wife from time to time about some things that have happened to him. For the most part, they are good things, things the man is excited about. Men would easily share on something that excites them, but when it comes to things they are not excited about, things that hurt them, it’s sometimes hard for them to open up and share such things with their partners.

 Some of these relationship communication tips could be considered common but practicing them would definitely reveal how important they are in building a relationship. Sometimes, you just need the right information to take your relationship to the next level or to make it more intimate. As you move from one stage of your relationship to the other, you must understand that effective communication is one of key to many problems and challenges which may arise. If you can remember and put the information above to practice, you will be just fine. It may take some efforts, but in the process of time, things will work out right.